Today was my best friends baby shower. We’re both 15 and she’s the only one besides my boyfriend that knew about my miscarriage. That knew about the son I can never hold. Someone from the shower came up to me and tommy and asked when we were gonna have our baby, it took every ounce of strength in my body not to break down. Not to scream out in pain. Just those few words hurt so much more than I could ever have imagined. I wanted so badly to say November 12, thats when Im having him. But I couldn’t. He’s gone. And it hurts. I want him back so badly. Every night I hold my stomach and tell him I love him even though hes not there. Every night I go to bed thinking its all a nightmare. That’s he’s still in my stomach. But today marks two months since I lost my baby, since I lost my Aiden. I miss you so much baby, I would’ve done everything I could’ve for you. I know I wouldn’t have been able to give you everything but I would’ve done anything to make you happy.